Finding humanity in a new decade

I wonder. What will this year be about? What will this decade be about? I wonder with hope. I wonder with a belief in humanity. I wonder with a belief in myself.

Yes it is possible. I truly believe deep down in the depths of my soul that it is possible.

Possible for what you may ask?

Possible for peace.

Yes. I truly believe this is possible.

I also believe, and this is where again it gets interesting since it is just my belief, that it might be a bit of a bumpy road to get there. I am calling it like it is based on observation, a feeling in my gut, experience and knowing. I am calling this because I want us all to take notice on both a personal level and a community level.

My voice is one. Some may say that is not much. Again I believe it is more than enough. One voice is enough to start a change. One voice is enough to start a conversation. I know that my reach is not massive. That does not bother me. I know that my current state of being and affairs means I am pretty much in hiding. That does not bother me. What bothers me is the thought of waking up a year from now and realising I did not do anything. So this year is now about doing something.

If you are a follower of my writing, podcast or other sharing you will also know that my focus is always about helping people be more authentic, real and true to self. In this time it may be perceived as a selfish act. Yet once again I stand strong in the position that if we don’t get ourselves right then we are in no position to serve others. We can, true. Yet when we give all of ourselves away without looking after self then I know, not just believe, we can spiral down into inability to act, or even worse.

No this is a call out to people to go forward as whole people, to go forward and serve and be you with others in your service. It is always a dual journey. One where you check in and make sure you are ok and one where you check in and make sure others are too. What others see is just you checking on them. They will know though if you are not doing the self bit too. It will come through.

I believe that at this point in time we are in a big mix of emotions. We are all on alert in some way. Life is these days filled with reminders of it’s fragility. Life is testing many of us on a local, national and global level.

We can turn away and not notice. Yet the world will creep up on us. Whether it is a shut down in normal operations, a change in the routine of others, events not going ahead, unprecedented weather events, other disasters, travel diverted, financial hiccups in the market. We are not immune. At some point we are all touched by events happening around us whether we open our eyes or not.

Now this is a fairly dreary view, is it not. Can’t escape, can’t go anywhere. What can we do?

We can do a lot more than we are right now. We can also do it differently. For what we are going through now requires us to ramp up to a new level of care, compassion and connection than ever before. Again just my view, yet I am feeling this so strongly in me at this start of this year and decade that it needs stating.

An aspiration. We see humanity in all. We look at the people around us and see them as us. We connect. We care. We pay attention.

This seemingly straightforward action is not so simple for many. For if it were we would be doing so already.

Instead what is getting in the way is a slinging match of anger and hate fuelled by fear. Anxiety breeding reaction. Absence of self love limiting ability to other love. All you have to do is turn on the news, read a paper, check social media.

Then if we are not caught up in a maelstrom of emotion we distract ourselves with trivial or matters that do not seem relevant. We go to our safe escapes. These days they can be online or in person. We turn off reality. We run away. It is just too hard, isn’t it.

For some it really is too hard right now. I totally 100% understand and get that. I have had so many days, weeks months even years in my life where it was just too hard. I went to therapy and coaching for years to get past the words it is too hard. At some point though too hard is just a place to live as a victim. I know this. I also know that beneath the too hard is wounding and hurt that needs healing. So the antidote to too hard is supportive discovery, dialogue, acceptance and understanding. Then it requires practice and time. It is possible to get past the too hard.

The other part of the too hard is projecting our judgement on others or reacting to our own fear with blame. We are also insecure to some degree and lacking in our own sense of self being good and capable at times, right? So it is much easier to go looking for others who are less or to make them seem lesser. And I don’t mean making jokes in times of crisis. What I mean is not seeing the humanity of others, our self and all of us together.

The choice to judge another requires a conscious awareness and unravelling of mindset, a change of our views of the world. This change may require letting go of others or ways that no longer support. This change may mean breaking free of limitations place on you by others or even yourself. This change requires an inner shift, recalibration to the essence of your own humanity.

How?

We start with what we can.

What you can do may be different from what I or others can do.

Jenn Shallvey17 January 2020